Hi all- can you belive that the fantasy Football season is half-over? Incredible. Seems like only yesterday I was prepared to end up in the draft lottery again.
I thought it would be a good idea to issue some mid-term grades, comment on some situations, and eat some humble pie based on my pre-season preview. I am often wrong, and I usually admit it, so this will be no exception.
Let's look at each team, based on the standings after week 7.
1. Mud's Team 7-0: (note: for the teams that change names often, I will call them just as I did here).
Wow. Wowwee wow-wow-wow. Is this team that good?? I don't think so. Week 7 was eaked out because of Tony Romo's wittle pinky-winkie.(http://www.theonion.com/content/news/tony_womo_out_three_to_four_weeks).
The youth movement is working out, however. But this team will go as Romo goes.
Preseason prediction: 1
Preseason sleeper: All of them. I was right about most. Forte and Slaton have been awesome. Kevin Smith is the best player on a bad team. And DeSean Jackson has figured out how to hold on to the ball long enough to get in the end zone. I've recieved at least 5 trade offers for Forte. NO DICE, BABY.
Grade: A+ (did you really expect anything less? This is my team, for the love of God!)
2. DaPrez 5-2 ok, so I was a little off on this one. LT's injury, while not guresome, has hampered him without question. Jamal Lewis does suck, however- I was right on that one. But Ronnie Brown has been a nice surprise for DaPrez, when he isn't on DaPrez's bench. And Philip Rivers? WTF. But management has always been a question mark, and could bite him in the buttocks when he tries to do things that he shouldn't, like think. Put it on autopilot, buddy.
Preseason prediction: 7
Preseason sleeper: Jonathan Stewart. I was right on this one as well, but Stewart promises to be even better when he pulls a Rae Carruth and has DeAngelo Williams capped. Remember, they both play in Carolina.
Grade: A-
3. Tilt's team 5-2 This team can score. He has 2 of the best quarterbacks in Fantasy this year, which sucks for him because you can only start 1. As I said in the preview, this team's biggest issue is its owner, which was evidenced earlier on when he benched Drew Brees in favor of Kurt Warner's better matchup and cost himself a win. The lesson here: Never ever EVER bench Drew Brees.
Preseason prediction: 2
Preseason sleeper: Rashard Mendenhall. He showed falshes of brilliance until he fumbled away a leg (again, i called this one).
Grade: B+ I'd have given him an A, but when he over-thought his QB situation and cost him a win, well i had to tkae notice. His grade would have been a C, but his Roast of the Commish was classic. Bonus points here.
4. Rat and That Guy 5-2 Will these fuckers ever go away? I mean, come on. It seems like every year these guys just hang around. Kid's got alligator blood. If Peterson really gets going, look out- could be bad news for the rest of us. Fortunately for them, the That Guy front office power move has been squashed by Machiavelli Junior (the Rat) and things are right again in Wland. Also, I was wrong on Donald Driver. Not great, but serviceable.
Preseason prediction: 6
Preseason sleeper: Pierre Thomas. Well, he just sucks, even with the Reggie Bush injury. I think he has been on 4 different rosters so far this year.
Grade: A- I certainly didn't expect them to be in the playoff hunt. Did you?
5. The Fighting Amish 4-3 This guy has the 2 highest-scoring RBs in the league and is 4-3. What does that tell you? The rest of his team is a smelly mound of dung. Derek Anderson SUUUUCCCCKKKSSSSS. He should be at least 5-2.
Preseason prediction: 8
Preseason sleeper: Donnie Avery. Watch out, this guy is turning it on....However he plays in St Louis, which is a detriment.
Grade: C- Barber and Portis and he can't do better than 4-3. Sorry.
6. Del's Destroyers 3-4 Here's where we get into the crud of this league (no offense meant). There are 7 teams in this league that are below .500. That's more than half. And leading the charge? Del's Destroyers! This team is a tweener. Could easily be over .500, but isn't, so too bad. Ryan Grant has underperformed, but I was WAY off on Greg Jennings (and Aaron Rodgers too, for that matter). This is another GM that thinks too much. Notice a trend?
Preseason prediction: 9
Preseason sleeper: Ricky Williams. Mud was wrong! Mud was wrong! But seriously, how long before he gets sick of being on a bad team and sparks up again (if he isn't already)? Can you say "Whizzenator"?
Grade: C Not too much to work with. Gets a D in the draft.
7. The Clapp 3-4 This team is not good. Not good at all. Won 2 in a row, but just not a good team. But the owner is a rookie, and taking that into consideration, not bad results, I suppose. Memo to ownership: There is absolutely NO REASON to take 2 kickers in the draft. Jot that down for next year's draft, where you will probably be picking early. BTW, Larry Johnson has absolutely bent you over and violated you.
Preseason prediction: 4 (My worst pick no doubt)
Preseason sleeper: Matt Ryan. I stand by this one. This guy is only going to get better, and has not hurt his team much, which is impressive for a rookie QB.
Grade: C
8. Club Sub Convicts 3-4 *sniff* *sniff*...Smell that? It's a ridiculous rule change coming down, or a good trade rejected by the Commish. We all know that he is a sore loser, so we can't expect the season to go quietly without an outburst. This team has no RBs, a QB with no heart, and 4 flash-in-the-pan wideouts. What do you expect? Actually, that's wrong- Fat LenDale and Worse Willis are starting to play well. In fariness to him, the "Roast the Commish" thing was a great idea...
Preseason prediction: 10
Preseason sleeper: Ted Ginn Jr. I should have realized that this guy plays for Miami. i think he is a year (or 7) away.
Grade: D Please don't break up my team, Mr Commissioner Sir!!
9. The Warriors 3-4 Another one i was way off on, and i don't know why. I think injuries have hurt this team significantly, as well as Wade Philips being a horrible coach and under-utilizing Felix Jones. But hey, them's the breaks. Can't go to the Super Bowl every year, ya know, Class D or otherwise. Peyton Manning could be done....
Preseason prediction: 3
Preseason sleeper: Felix Jones. I think everyone (except Wade Philips) knows how good this guy is.
Grade: C This guy drafted all of the right guys, but things juts aren't working out. Took a stapler off my desk. Need you to go ahead and move your desk down into Storage BEEEE.
10. Hot Corner 2-5 This team is a complete enigma. 2-5 is a horrible reocrd, but led the league in scoring one week...What the Hell? Wideouts are tremendous, but everything else is crap. However, i can see this team making a second-half push, just before all of this team's players buy condos at The Villages, Florida's Friendliest Hometown, and buy $50,000 golf carts with 22-inch rims.
Preseason prediction: 11
Preseason sleeper: Thomas Jones. Again, I stand by this one. Not stud numbers, but solid. However, they throw too much...
Grade: D
11. The Schemers 1-6 Every Fantasy league this year has an owner who got pooned in the first 7 minutes of the Partiots season. The support group meets on Tuesday nights. As I said in the preview, injuries would hurt this team. However, even I had no idea it would be THIS bad. But here's another rookie owner, and I expect big things from him next year.
Preseason prediction: 5th (I was WAY off...Samsonite!)
Preseason sleeper: Eddie Royal. Another one i was right on! Holy shit!
Grade C This guy got screwed, but is doing his best to field a serviceable team each week, which is commendable.
12. CAPTAIN MORGAN MEN 1-6 Far and away the worst team in this league. For more info, read the season preview. Again. Sorry HRD, but I was dead on here.
Preseason prediction: 12 (wow, huh?)
Preseason sleeper: Darren Sproles. Not sure why San Diego, which is German for "a whale's vagina", wouldn't just sit LT down for a couple of weeks to get healthy. You are not losing much by having Sproles out there.
Grade A+ BEST....AVITARS....EVER.
There you have it. Good luck to all in the 2nd half of the season. And if you don't like what i have to say, feel free to blow it out your ass. As usual. Peace!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
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